hello again.....

ok, its such a long time im not updating at all my blog especially since i lost my lappy...
here is it..
im back here..
there's alot of thing happen to me....
hahahahaha...
well, tell u what... senentiasa feeling xbetul especially sekarang...
rse job yg buat skrg cannot make me feel happy, looking for a better job, good paid n leh travel sne sini..
the truth is sgt nyesal k amek tourism because i cant go anywhere beside travel line n i just so freakin hate it rite now...
sebut je travel sume org akn terbayang, luxurious, travel there n here, happening life, njoy but the truth is its suck, trust me...
life yg xbest langsung travel line ni, bukan sume dapat peluang travel here n there n bukan dapat gaji bnyak pun ciput je, gaji bdk diploma holder lagi besorrr, seyes wa cakap lu...
nk je ckp, i nk better life wif better paid, uwaaaaaa!
nk smbung study lagik uhukk... owh what should i do seyes i want to be the person i wish to be..
i want job yg bukan hanya stay in office but travel here n there and sambil2 tu i nk menyumbangkan sesuatu pada masyarakat.....
aduhhhhh! helppp!!! huhuhuhu seyes menchiii life sekarang, umo makin meningkat tp i hv nuthing in life, if nk masuk travel agency, xyah de degree pn xpe buang masa je, baik masuk pas spm, keje elok2 je, kompem pas u guys de exprience, senang je nk demand gaji dr sehelai degree yg xleh demand langsung!!!! travel line sux!!!!!! hahahahahahaha

perhaps perhaps perhaps

Every time you tell me about her
how shes hurt you so much
how she's keep come and go in your life
but still, you love her
Every time I'll be there for you
light's up ur day
And makes you smile
and every single time i shout out in my heart
I'm not ur dream girl but I swear I just want u 2 b happy
I swear I'll take good care of you..
we're friends, that's for sure
you always be there for me no matter what
and i also be there for you my dear
but once, we already across our boundaries as friends,
regret?
I'm not sure...
even i keep myself from you but i can't lie to myself
i start falling for you
I start to love you more and more
more then just a friend..
how should i tell you this is all about?
how should i tell you, ur the one I've been waiting for?
being wif u is what i want to be...

perhaps, perhaps, perhaps

i lost a friend

i lost a friend
when he said don't try 2 find him anymore..
i lost a friend
when he found out the part of me that I've been hiding from him
i know i never be honest with him most of the time
but I'm afraid i might lost him
but i lost him, forever
how I'm suppose to show you,
I've change if you never gave me a chance?

LIFE IS FULL OF WONDERS

Life is a world of wonderslife is sandy
life is lonelylife can also be full of different activities.
life is caringlife is hatredlife is always full of mysteries
life is full lovelife is full of up and downs
life is mischief
life is entertaininglife is curiouslifeis full of uderstanding
life is hopelife is sometimes full of hopelessness
life is full of different crimes like stealing, killing..
well life is always interesting

first of the year

its been such a long2 time i havent write anything..
well, not much to write actually..
i just wondering around wif my life try 2 back on track..
hahahah..
well, im back..
i guess..
=)

When I feel lost

When I feel lost, sad and lonely

I usually stood at the end of the road

Looking at the light by the road

The cars that passing by,

I stood still, wondering…

With all the complicated feeling in my mind,

With all the memories that come and go in my mind,

I wonder about everything..

As I stood still,

I feel like wanted to cry,

By the end of the road,

I see the light and it started to change in a second..

During dawn, I’m holding my hope and dreams with me,

Still stay stood until I didn’t realize

How time already passed me by

I’m think I’m moving

But in the end I’ve gone no where..

Sometime’s I wonder,

Why I have to grown up?

Why I have to be a grown up?

Have to hide my true feelings…

When I started to realize all this,

I also realize how time passed me by..

The sun light up my bedroom window,

I couldn’t believe it already morning,

Realize that I’m under the beautiful sunlight,

So warm and tender..

Feels like I’ve been giving a second chance

To create my life like I always wanted to do..

Ya Allah,

Make me peace at heart

Forever and ever..

- Erza Ibrahim -

A Song Of A Young Lady To Her Ancient Lover

Ancient Person, for who I am
All the flattering youth defy,
Long be it ere thou grow old,
Aching, shaking, crazy cold;
But still continue as thou art,

Ancient Person of my heart.
On thy withered lips adn dry,
Which like baren furrows lie,
Brooding kisses I will pour,
Shall thy youthful heat restore,
Such kind show'rs in autumn fall,
And a second spring recall;
Nor from thee will ever part,
Ancient Person of my heart.

Thy nobler parts, which but to name,
In our sex world be counted shame,
By age's frozen graps posset,
From their ice shall be relesed,
And, soothed by my reving hand,
In former warmth and vigour stand.

All a lover's wish can reach,
For thy joy my love shall teach;
And for the plesure shall improve.

All the art can add to love.
Yes still i love thee without art,
Ancient Person of my heart.

~ JOHN WILMOT, EARL OF ROCHESTER ~

If you love someone, you got to learn to let them go

there are time in my life
when i open my eyes and there you are
u were more than a dream
i can reach u and touch u boy
and that was long ago
there are something
that i guess i never know
when u love someone
u got to learn to let them go
when i dream about u
dats when everything all right
you here in my arms
here next to me, forever
when i dream about u,
boy u never go away
i just cloce my eyes and wait for my dream
because i still lost, loving you...
how can i get u to see
dat im falling apart since u been gone
i can never be sure
i cant never let go
your love is much too strong
there are something
that i guess i never know
when u love someone
u got to learn to let them go

- Erza Ibrahim -

After the first paper

my fisrt paper for diz sem is research methodology..
damn im so scare for diz subject start from the begining of diz sem coz itsss ssoooooooooo scary..
but alhamdulillah after the paper i feel more relief..
hope 2 morrow paper will be much much more better..
da la lec aku tuh kelekut markah..
huhuhuhuhu..
pray for me my fwen..
=)

- Erza Ibrahim -

Save me, please...

i think i want to wrote sumthin today but still dun hv any idea
my life doin great lately..
i guess avoiding 'it' is really a good action and solution after all
its about 2 weeks more before my final starts..
have to gave all out during the study week..
chaiyok chaiyok faa!!
u can do it gurl..
i want to prove than i am much more better than dat sucker..
i will have much more better life after my graduation because im much more better than him..
and his slut huhuhuhuhu..
but erything turn out so fine lately..
alhamdulilah..
last nite my best buddy, emah have a very private chat..
1st its all about her and didios, her bf..
and when turn to me..
she said im not who i am lately..
i trying to be somebody..
am i?
i kno i quite rude n selfish lately but am i try 2 be sombody..
she says im change alot..
even im much more prettier than before but my cute is already gone..
vanish somehow..
am i?
i always fake my smile these past few month
even when i try 2 smile from my heart..
it dosent work anymore...
i still crying from the bottom of my heart..
still suffer from the broken heart..
i change b name from ejard evil to cruel heart breaker in my name list
he is cruel all right..
i wish i just like him.. very strong and frank...
but still remember about him all the time..
y? hate to be in love again...
the feeling is hurt so damn much..
is diz love suppose to be huh?
crush + feelings=love but end up ruin my own life and almost ruin my future..
is diz what love is all about?
could someone tell me what love is all about..
i dun feel any good feelings bout love
i just feel the pain and the sorrow..
duh hate it..
i wanna be my self again..
the sweet fariza i used 2 b..
i wanna be me again..
i dun wanna be hot i just wanna be cute..
help me someone,
help me anybody..
just save me..
anyway, wish me luck for my final..
do pray for my victory my fellow fwens..

- Erza Ibrahim -

What A Buzzzyyyyyyyy Day

its about a few week i dosent post anything on my blog..
been so damn bz the whole week but i like the way when im so bz...
i started on last week,
ive been bz wif my class n on fri, i go to pwtc, the tourism library on 24th floor..
return book and do some research bout cuti-cuti malaysia campaign, then haded bck to shAH alam..
arrived at shah alm at about 7.20 then i hv 2 get ready 4 the dinner..
my fwen, ayu n de pick me up aroun 8.40
we haded to nailis sentul and hv dinner there
its such a fun when hang out all wif girls only..
as usual that mr ee try to get kno me better..
and everytime i go there he usually ask me the same question..
then after dinner we haded back to shah alm n arrived at about 130 am in the morning..
the nex day, i already arrive at my faculty b4 8 in the morinng for PD seminar
and the damn bowring seminar is held until 5++ pm..
im so tired and damn boring during the seminar..
after that had a discussion at dc around 8.30 Pm and lasted around 11 pm
direct go back to my house and fall asleep after i hv a very good hot bath..
then the nex day i hv 2 be at in front of college seroja b4 730 pm
i gave my name for volunteer zoo negara..
its fun after all even a little bit tired...
but i like to do these kind of job..
actually its the 1st time i go to zoo negara..
its such a very exciting experience..
i go to sani coner for the char koew teaw for my dinner..
then have a long long sleep after that..
i dun kno y but i like been bz like diz..
its make me not think about none sens thing alot..
but still, when im on the way bck 2 shah alam from zoo,
passing by bndar tasik pemaisuri, cheras..
i still think bout him..
when im at pwtc, he still on my mind all the time
and when i have dinner at nailis, i think about him more
especially when im looking at those tables and chairs,
that we use 2 sit when we are apart of each other b4..
dear so called b,
i want to confess i miss you so much..
but i will get over u one fine day..
i started to go out seriously on a date..
dun want to flirt around anymore..
even i still not found the right one yet but
i will get over u..
but in the mean time, i miss u so much..

- Erza Ibrahim -